May 21 Expectations

This is going to be the most exciting day of the year! After much anticipation the end of the world is coming. I don’t care because I truly believe I am ready because I have made my relationship with God right. Since I know I’m ready, I will get great joy out of any of these scenarios: the world ends, the world doesn’t end, Lindsey Lohan gets arrested again.

I believe that no one can know when the end of the world is coming and I believe that the bible teaches that. I didn’t make it up. So I have a bunch of friends ridiculing Harold Camping because he can’t know, therefore IT WON’T HAPPEN. But, none of us can know so the world could end May 21 or right now. When they’re in total shock in the presence of the Lord May 22, I will be ROFL or RIHL(rolling in heaven laughing). “Man, you should see the look on your face!! You never saw it coming!!!”.

I have many other reasons to desire the world to end May 21st. For instance, I will be relieved of the worry that all those things in the past that I thougth would catch up with me won’t get a chance. Woohoo!! Unknown things remained unknown. Also, my wife and I use our Discover card for everything and pay it off every month in order to accumulate bonus cash. A couple of times I accidentally paid late and they charged me a handsome late fee. I want to stick them with a honking big bill. Even though a May 21 end will cut 10 days off my spending I’ll still feel satisfied. Since I have a family of five. Thank you!

If the end doesn’t come May 21, I want to see Harold Camping dropped by parachute in the middle of Libya and his U.S. citizenship revoked. Seriously, I want to see NBC, CNN, FOX, and CBS chase him down and ask him 1000 questions related to the circumstances of his failure(2nd failure).

If Lindsey Lohan gets arrested again, it will be a true indicator that we can breath easy. It just means everyone’s back to business doing what they do best.

If you believe in a May 21 end….PEACE! If not, PARTY ON!

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